Nikki Glaser Shares Cut Jokes from 2025 Golden Globes Set

Nikki Glaser is well-known for her sharp humor, and many anticipated her performance at the 2025 Golden Globes to be a full-on roast. However, on January 5, 2025, Glaser chose a slightly softer tone for her opening monologue, which received positive feedback from critics and audiences.

Nonetheless, fans looking for her edgier material were treated to some of her unfiltered jokes during her appearance on SiriusXM's The Howard Stern Show the following day. Glaser fondly referred to her collection of unsaid jokes as the "Stern file," stating she created them in the writer's room.

Starting Strong

Glaser opened her segment with a quip about the Golden Globes itself: "The Golden Globes is the only show where you can see the biggest stars and movies joined together with the same goal — getting out before Dax Shepard asks them to do his podcast!" She followed it up with another jab, saying, "This is the last time all of you will be in the same room together until the Diddy trial." Stern was pleasantly surprised that Glaser didn't use one specific Diddy joke, needing to clarify that she felt another made more sense.

Cutting Room Floor Gems

Glaser shared several jokes that were left out of the broadcast. For example, she poked fun at Glen Powell's nomination for Hit Man by saying, "Who would have thought that by the end of the year, you'd only be the second hottest hit man in America?" She explained that the Luigi Mangione reference was scrapped as it required audience context that might have been lost on many.

Another joke aimed at the Catholic Church read, "I love Conclave and think it's about cardinals choosing a new pope. It’s so touching that after the film, the church will have to move it to another theater. A hot tip, you don’t need ID to get into the Conclave afterparty!" Glaser noted that Catholic Church humor is often overplayed.

Exploring Comedy Themes

Glaser also shared an intended joke about Adrian Brody: "Oh, look, it's two-time Holocaust survivor, Adrian Brody." The original punchline was even darker, revealing her concern about its impact on the audience. Glaser mentioned that her young assistant did not grasp the historical reference and concluded it might confuse younger listeners.

She discussed the cast of Only Murders in the Building by stating, "It’s inspiring to see legends like Steve Martin and Martin Short still working hard — it just goes to show you are never too old to still need money!" Glaser's self-deprecating humor also made an appearance when she joked, "Amy Adams is nominated for Night Bitch, while I was totally snubbed for my performance in 'Day Slut.'"

Cheeky Observations

One of her more daring observations referenced Nicole Kidman, joking, "Wild Robot is nominated tonight. And by that, I mean Nicole Kidman after two white wines," expressing her uncertainty about Kidman's potential reaction to the quip. She also commented on Ben Affleck by considering whether to roast or toast him, musing about which Jennifer Affleck might be involved next.

In a laughable jab at Denzel Washington, she said, "The only thing that has convinced more middle-aged men they could pull off an earring than Denzel Washington is cocaine." Glaser did not hold back with her commentary on Timothée Chalamet, pairing him with Bob Dylan humorously: "To sound like Bob Dylan, Timothée Chalamet took years of vocal lessons because that's how long it takes to learn to smoke 40,000 cigarettes."

Capping it Off with a Punch

She ended her rundown of cut jokes with a political jab regarding the film Anora, humorously comparing it to Matt Gaetz's payment history. Glaser cleverly simplified the experience of the Golden Globes by stating, "Squid Games is a show where people starve themselves ruthlessly competing for the ultimate prize. Oh, wait, sorry, that’s this show!"

Overall, Glaser's cut content reflects her ability to blend timely humor with a touch of controversy, showcasing her distinctive comedic style.

comedy, glamour, celebrities, jokes